Just-a-pretend like yousa one of the chumps in dat picture, see?

http://gangsterner...like-gangster.html


"You may have noticed that the criminal element in Guys and Dolls (and in many New York gangster movies) have a very unique way of speaking.

It is formal and riddled with slang, always in the present tense and completely devoid of contractions. You’ve heard it in a thousand gangster movies and cartoons, all thanks to Damon Runyon who invented it and planted it in the popular imagination.

The style follows simple rules, making it easy for you to translate anything you might wish to say into Runyonesque gangster speak.

To talk like a gangster you:

1. Use only present and future tense.

2. Never use a contraction. “It is” “we are” etc.

3. Try to use three words where one word will do.

4. If you have the chance to throw in a thirty cent word, do so. Straighten your tie while using it to demonstrate that you have class.

5. Nearly any word can substitute for woman. “doll,” of course, but also “pancake,” “tomato,” “bird,” etc. Also if it has to do with alcohol, gambling, guns or crime, you never call it by its actual name. The more obscure and elaborate the slang, the better."

I say...not on my watch, old chap.