I recently pissed on a couch belonging to a rat motherfucker who was sleeping on said couch. I might have pissed on his crotch. I definitely pissed on the right leg of his trousers. Then I took the last beer from his fridge, left the fridge door open, and then dumped an ashtray onto his carpet.

Kidding. I just pissed on his couch.

Now that's what I'm talkin about.

I also pissed on his cat.

I pissed on a cow once because its owner thoughtlessly put up a fence by the bombing range we were trying to get to. We had been trying to get there all morning and kept running into fences. So I gave the order to start drinking, hosed the cow, and we drove around back following a service road for a pipeline. Long story short, cow got pissed on, we got bombs. Capital B, small o, big fuckin M. And we had enough beer for a 30 stand-off.