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UER Forum > Private Boards Index > Relationships > advice?if you got any..tell me (Viewed 1868 times)
DEF3836586 


Location: Tha 248 to the 586 to the 313 all the way to the 734
Gender: Male
Total Likes: 10 likes


Free spirit

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advice?if you got any..tell me
< on 11/21/2014 9:47 PM >
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Posted on Forum: UER Forum
This girl and myself have been seeing each other for awhile(it has been roughly two months)(That may not seem like a long time to some of you but whatever)

anyway..we were doing fine and dandy(we had seemed to click right away..im not sayin we feel madly in love but ya know what i mean),talking on Skype when I wasn't able to drive to see her(it's not that far,plus i drive an old 4 banger so it's decent on the wallet too)When I wasn't working on my weekends or days off i would save up what was left of my paycheck and go on up to see her and as I said we were all fine and dandy that is up until a night or so ago.
Out of the blue she said she wasn't sure what she wanted,that we were rushing(which we're not..at least in my opinion..but hey,what does it matter what i think,right?!)She had also mentioned how she needed time alone and all this other shit.I found it kind of weird how that out of nowhere she makes a decision like that after i've been helping her with her son when i could,watching him for her while she went to visit friends and such and i even put food in the house for all of us(but more so for her and her son)

It's almost like she's pushing me away or trying to.But when I brought how I feel to her attention she became a little defensive and stated something to the fact that If I want to leave she isn't going to beg me to stay and that sort of thing,when I never even mentioned anything about leaving her in the dark.I don't know..maybe I wasted my time

Well Looks like it'll just be all about me,makin that cash money and booze now..at least booze has never let me down..that i know of haha

NOW WHERES MAAA BOTTLE,DAMNIT!



[last edit 11/22/2014 1:21 AM by DEF3836586 - edited 3 times]

Bonjour,sa va?Fuck you
G to the Race 


Total Likes: 305 likes


Hi!

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Re: advice?if you got any..tell me
< Reply # 1 on 11/24/2014 1:35 AM >
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This reads like a classic case of Nice Guy. I'm at a loss to understand why women push away men who are nice to them, but they do it a lot. I guess the danger factor of being w/abusive men is too tempting for some women. When she says "we are rushing" is that a sexual thing? Maybe you're the first guy she's been w/since her child's father? Again, I cannot say.

Bottom line: if you dig her, hold out, she may just be telling the truth and has to figure some shit out before she goes all-in. Give her the space she requested and see if she gets back to you.



[last edit 11/24/2014 1:36 AM by G to the Race - edited 1 times]

You betcha
Shawn W. 


Location: Niagara Falls, NY
Gender: Male
Total Likes: 131 likes


Optimistic Pessimist

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Re: advice?if you got any..tell me
< Reply # 2 on 11/24/2014 6:30 AM >
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There's a difference between a nice guy and a "nice guy". Considering that Stealthy has resorted to boozing himself into oblivion after a woman who he's been dating for just two months basically told him that she's not sure where she wants to go from here but hasn't officially broken up with him, then I'll let you ponder which he may be.



[last edit 11/24/2014 6:30 AM by Shawn W. - edited 1 times]

What is a rebel? A man who says no. - Albert Camus
G to the Race 


Total Likes: 305 likes


Hi!

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Re: advice?if you got any..tell me
< Reply # 3 on 11/24/2014 4:22 PM >
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Posted by Shawn W.
There's a difference between a nice guy and a "nice guy". Considering that Stealthy has resorted to boozing himself into oblivion after a woman who he's been dating for just two months basically told him that she's not sure where she wants to go from here but hasn't officially broken up with him, then I'll let you ponder which he may be.


TOO MUCH PONDERING! JUST TELL ME!!!




You betcha
RescueMe1060 


Location: San Francisco
Gender: Male
Total Likes: 1645 likes


Radioactivity, its in the air for you & me

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Re: advice?if you got any..tell me
< Reply # 4 on 11/24/2014 5:15 PM >
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Time to move on




http://www.flickr....rescueme1060/sets/
blitz 


Location: Cumberland, ME
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Good news!

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Re: advice?if you got any..tell me
< Reply # 5 on 11/24/2014 11:11 PM >
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Posted by Stealthy666
Out of the blue she said she wasn't sure what she wanted,that we were rushing(which we're not..at least in my opinion..but hey,what does it matter what i think,right?!)She had also mentioned how she needed time alone and all this other shit.


Three pretty vague excuses. I'd say my peace and dip.




I may not believe in marriage, but I do believe in best men.
Lexi 


Location: Oslo, Norway
Gender: Female
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I'm getting old.

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Re: advice?if you got any..tell me
< Reply # 6 on 11/25/2014 9:08 PM >
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Posted by G to the Race
This reads like a classic case of Nice Guy. I'm at a loss to understand why women push away men who are nice to them, but they do it a lot. I guess the danger factor of being w/abusive men is too tempting for some women. When she says "we are rushing" is that a sexual thing? Maybe you're the first guy she's been w/since her child's father? Again, I cannot say.

Bottom line: if you dig her, hold out, she may just be telling the truth and has to figure some shit out before she goes all-in. Give her the space she requested and see if she gets back to you.


Why do women push men away who are nice to them? Because being nice to someone isn't the only prerequisite for a happy and healthy relationship. Women are under no obligation to do anything for a man just because they're nice (which they should be doing in the first place).

Maybe she's decided she's just not that into you. Whatever her reasons, if she doesn't want to be with you or wants space, that's her choice. 2 months is chump change in the grand scheme of things. If she doesn't want to stay, be a mature adult and move on.




[15:00:33] <SeeThirty> cause you're not likely to be anywhere that other people haven't been who didn't have protection
[15:00:41] <SeeThirty> still better safe than lexi
unlighted-zero 


Location: Hamilton, ON
Gender: Male
Total Likes: 68 likes


havin a time

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Re: advice?if you got any..tell me
< Reply # 7 on 11/27/2014 7:16 AM >
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What everyone else said. Say your shit and move on.




/flail it til ya nail it
shadowedsmile 


Location: Northwestern Ontario
Gender: Female
Total Likes: 157 likes


mines always on the mind

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Re: advice?if you got any..tell me
< Reply # 8 on 11/27/2014 7:46 PM >
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Posted by G to the Race
This reads like a classic case of Nice Guy. I'm at a loss to understand why women push away men who are nice to them, but they do it a lot. I guess the danger factor of being w/abusive men is too tempting for some women.


Most abusive men start out as the "Nice Guy", and often like to guilt trip women because they spent x number of dollars, helped them do x, have done nothing but favours for them, etc etc...(I was with one for almost four years, they will even try to convince you that it's YOUR fault they "had" to break your bones, and besides...they bought you dinner so it's fine!)

I'm gonna agree with Shawn here.

And if you don't regularly see someone, it can be hard to see or know that they're questioning how things are going, or what went wrong...maybe she's just not feeling it, and doesn't want you to keep committing time and money if she's not sure?




"Adventure is the respectful pursuit of trouble." - Expedition Overland
DEF3836586 


Location: Tha 248 to the 586 to the 313 all the way to the 734
Gender: Male
Total Likes: 10 likes


Free spirit

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Re: advice?if you got any..tell me
< Reply # 9 on 11/30/2014 2:03 AM >
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Her and I are on speaking terms again..it seems as though it's going slow but steady,who knows what tomorrow brings..Thanks for the advice all..I hope we work things out




Bonjour,sa va?Fuck you
UER Forum > Private Boards Index > Relationships > advice?if you got any..tell me (Viewed 1868 times)


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