I am sick of being alone... my last "boyfriend" really hurt me (haha remember previous thread...) and I really ought to move on and stop talking to him....


I just started going to college so i have met a few guys but... a lot of them are younger than me and will prolly find someone younger and more attractive than me...

I don't know how else to meet guys, i dont really have a whole lot of friends... and most of them are married or in serious relationships... or... guys that dig me that i dont dig back. I feel like a loser but i just cant take it anymore, I need to start hanging out with people who have similar interests

Posted by Senseriffic I am sick of being alone... my last "boyfriend" really hurt me (haha remember previous thread...) and I really ought to move on and stop talking to him.... I just started going to college so i have met a few guys but... a lot of them are younger than me and will prolly find someone younger and more attractive than me... I don't know how else to meet guys, i dont really have a whole lot of friends... and most of them are married or in serious relationships... or... guys that dig me that i dont dig back. I feel like a loser but i just cant take it anymore, I need to start hanging out with people who have similar interests

forget about dating. Work on you self esteem first. If you don't see yourself as attractive, no one else will. One of the problem that people have is that they think way to much. If you feel lonely, surround yourself with friends. But don't look for a boyfriend. As I've said before, once you stop looking, you will find what you were looking for.

Online dating is not pathetic, just be careful with it.

Dirt gave you some great advise. You need to spend some time on you first. Go after some of the things that you make you feel you need to say Eh! they will prolly find someone younger and more attractive than me... When you don't feel good about yourself, to you it may seem you are being shy, but to others it might appear as if you are uninterested and stuck up. Hold your head up and pay attention. I think you will be surprised to see guys that are interested, you just missed them being to preoccupied with your thoughts of how they are perceiving you.

There is a lot of truth behind that tired cliche, If you look good you feel good and if you feel good you look good.

Posted by dirt forget about dating. Work on you self esteem first. If you don't see yourself as attractive, no one else will. One of the problem that people have is that they think way to much. If you feel lonely, surround yourself with friends. But don't look for a boyfriend. As I've said before, once you stop looking, you will find what you were looking for.

Well put and right on the mark.
I had stopped looking and that's when Shutterbug and I found each other. And I will add, it's been a great 15years (married almost 5 years now). Looking forward to many more.

Forget the online dating Senseriffic. You don't know what kind of people you're hooking up with until it's too late. As dirt put it, get together with friends and get out. If you meet with someone and you like them, get to know them.

i was going to add something but i think the best advice was already given

I agree, online dating is not pathetic; you just need to be careful. Plus, you probably have to date the guy in person for many months to weed out the potential bullshit he could have been feeding you online. Not that everyone has that MO, but its so easy to lie about yourself online.

Don't rush into finding a boyfriend; it will happen. Enjoy your time single and yes, work on yourself. Make some decent guy "friends" and see if it turns into something. And definately stop talking to the ex who hurt you. You will never heal and move on otherwise. Having "relationship residue" sucks.

BTW, many guys LOVE older women. The whole "I need someone younger and more attractive" doesn't seem to hit most guys until their in their 40's and 50's when their hitting a midlife crisis!

Best advice in first two posts. I was in a similar situation as yourself, but chose not to resort to online dating. I let time pass, grew to be a bit more social and met my present girlfriend (although she is honestly way more outgoing and social than I).

I met Atomx (husband for almost 4 years now) on HotorNot.com


Yes, I'm a loser, but it brought us together, and I'm so thankful for that.


I see no problem in it, just be careful and use your instincts and common sense.

Id go out with friends if i had any... or if the ones i DO have had any lol

The only issue i have with myself is im too fat. I love everything else about myself... so... its a matter of time and discpiline, and i try not to let guys see my lack of confidence with my body.

I guess if these college boys dont work out Ill dabble more into the online thing, im very very picky though so finding someone who matches me is nearly impossible...

Posted by Senseriffic Id go out with friends if i had any... or if the ones i DO have had any lol The only issue i have with myself is im too fat. I love everything else about myself... so... its a matter of time and discpiline, and i try not to let guys see my lack of confidence with my body. I guess if these college boys dont work out Ill dabble more into the online thing, im very very picky though so finding someone who matches me is nearly impossible...

You're too fat? And that's a legit reason to be lonely? I've been fat my whole life and have been through the lack of confidence with my body as well. I finally wised up and stopped letting it get in the way of being with people. I've been losing weight too but for medical reasons.

Do what you can about the weight (see the doctor to see how much you can lose safely) but, don't let it hold you back and don't get obsessed with losing weight. Get together with people or get involved with the community (ie. volunteer work). That can be a big help in getting your confidence up. It's not easy but it can be done.

And as Debi mentioned, not all guys are looking for someone younger than themselves. I remember in college some of the mature female students being pretty hot. Maybe not as models but I found them attractive. I dated one myself and while we didn't go any further, we had fun. Don't write those guys off too quickly.

Best of luck to you.

Posted by rainman8889 Forget the online dating Senseriffic. You don't know what kind of people you're hooking up with until it's too late. As dirt put it, get together with friends and get out. If you meet with someone and you like them, get to know them.

A stranger is a stranger no matter where you meet them. A stranger in a bar can lie just as easily in person as online (except for their looks, but meh, that shit would be found out soon enough either way). I don't understand why so many people pretend to be above internet dating, the internet is the future maaan and also a popular way to communicate. I'm sure a lot of people have made friends off this site, why is it so hard to believe you could also find a significant other online?

Posted by Skold A stranger is a stranger no matter where you meet them. A stranger in a bar can lie just as easily in person as online (except for their looks, but meh, that shit would be found out soon enough either way). I don't understand why so many people pretend to be above internet dating, the internet is the future maaan and also a popular way to communicate. I'm sure a lot of people have made friends off this site, why is it so hard to believe you could also find a significant other online?

Good points there.

However, when you start talking face to face with someone, you get a better picture of what that person is like. And while that person can be a great bullshitter and fool you completely, it is harder to keep up the pretense in person than it is over the internet.

While the internet is the future, a lot of people believe in the old way of getting to know people. Face to face.

Posted by rainman8889 Good points there. However, when you start talking face to face with someone, you get a better picture of what that person is like. And while that person can be a great bullshitter and fool you completely, it is harder to keep up the pretense in person than it is over the internet. While the internet is the future, a lot of people believe in the old way of getting to know people. Face to face.

But the thing is, you usually meet these people from the net relatively quickly after, so you still get the face to face picture. A little bit of both is good, no need to stick to one method of meeting people exclusively!

It doesn't really matter how you meet people, internet or not.

But the thing that gets me going is the fat thing. As far as can tell from your avatar, you are not morbidly obese. A little chub is a good thing. My partner is not skinny, So can the fat talk.

The best thing is to not compare, as comparisons lead to unhappiness.

All right, all right. I'll take care of this. You just can just go out with me. I'm quite the catch.

Another problem solved by Uncle Whitey. Next!

Posted by White Rabbit All right, all right. I'll take care of this. You just can just go out with me. I'm quite the catch. Another problem solved by Uncle Whitey. Next!

I bet your mother thinks you are cool.

Posted by dirt I bet your mother thinks you are cool.

And she is so fucking right.

Posted by White Rabbit All right, all right. I'll take care of this. You just can just go out with me. I'm quite the catch. Another problem solved by Uncle Whitey. Next!

world hunger.... solve!!!!

Posted by Senseriffic world hunger.... solve!!!!

All the hungry kids get dates with White Rabbit??

Posted by Stewie All the hungry kids get dates with White Rabbit??

Sort of. The Rabbit eats anything you put in front of him.

YO SENS...keep your chin up. Be smart and post pics when it works out.

Seriously...it will work out.