I have had a crush on this guy for about 8 months. We are good friends and have been gradually getting closer. He likes me too, or so I thought. A couple weeks ago, I found out that he just likes me as a friend. Awhile back, he told me that he did like me, but was deciding whether or not he did didn't. I asked him about it and he either said he thought he liked me but realized he didn't, or he never really did. He had some family issues and has been emotionally stressed so that might be why he thought he did.

He knows that I like him and he seems comfortable with it. He told me that I am, however his best friend. Before I found out that he doesn't really love me, he asked me to go ice skating with him and some other places. The equivalent of a date, I guess. I go over to his house a lot and we hang out and really enjoy each other's company a lot. When I was about to leave from his house, he said that he really didn't want me to leave. I ended up spending the night. In a couple of weeks, I plan on taking him to this abandoned house by the railroad tracks. He seems excited about me going there. I want to be so much more than just friends with this guy.

My math tutor told me that the best marriages often start out as being friends. My question to you is: What can I do to get out of his friend zone and have him think of me as more than just a friend?

Posted by monster I have had a crush on this guy for about 8 months. We are good friends and have been gradually getting closer. He likes me too, or so I thought. A couple weeks ago, I found out that he just likes me as a friend. Awhile back, he told me that he did like me, but was deciding whether or not he did didn't. I asked him about it and he either said he thought he liked me but realized he didn't, or he never really did. He had some family issues and has been emotionally stressed so that might be why he thought he did. He knows that I like him and he seems comfortable with it. He told me that I am, however his best friend. Before I found out that he doesn't really love me, he asked me to go ice skating with him and some other places. The equivalent of a date, I guess. I go over to his house a lot and we hang out and really enjoy each other's company a lot. When I was about to leave from his house, he said that he really didn't want me to leave. I ended up spending the night. In a couple of weeks, I plan on taking him to this abandoned house by the railroad tracks. He seems excited about me going there. I want to be so much more than just friends with this guy. My math tutor told me that the best marriages often start out as being friends. My question to you is: What can I do to get out of his friend zone and have him think of me as more than just a friend?

Ask yourself this really important question:

How can you be friends with someone you don't love?

Think of it from both perspectives.

There are feelings, then there are decisions. Love just kinda exists(on both parts), and from there, you decide where that relationship goes.

So to answer your question, there is no way to force what you want. But you can always be honest. Trust me, honesty will go far. Without it, be prepared for heartbreak. Just know that he can't read your mind. Life is not a romantic comedy or a fairytale.

"Kiss to soon may be the full stop to the tale if love; a kiss in time saveth many huffy moments and wasted words. But a kiss too late-is the devil and all"
~The Maxims of Merlin

You have boobs, right? Take your shirt off.

Wait...

Have him drink a little, and then take your shirt off! Just be aware that even if you become more-than-friends, that doesn't mean you'll stay that way, and you'll probably end up as less-than-friends. Not certain, but probable.

The best relationships I've been in have come from being friends first.

My current relationship is with someone who I was friends with for YEARS first.

So, I guess it depends on how patient you are. I wouldn't stop looking around at other guys you may be interested in, because you may never move out of the friend zone with this guy. The upside to that is that if he gets jealous when he sees you with somebody else, it may make him realize that he likes you more than a friend.

With that being said, I agree with whoever said you can't force a guy to like you.

What I've seen is that it's usually girls who place guys in their "friend zone", not the other way around. That's just from my experience, of course, but damn, the roles reversed must be pretty annoying.

By the sounds of it all he wants you to be is a great friend to him, and if you want to keep that friendship (ie. not take a gamble at taking it to the next level and "losing") that's what I'd leave it as. It's entirely up to you, and I'm hardly the best person to give relationship advice, but that's just what I'd do from my point of view.

Whatever happened to just enjoying your time with him?

Don't rush or push anything, you'll make it awkward. If it's meant to be, it will happen. Until then, just be glad he's in your life and cherish your friendship.

Put some date rape in his drink.

He'll be more open to a relationship when he wakes up with you naked.

Nothing can get you out of the friend zone. We've even tried high explosives. Right, Mandias?

EDIT:

Posted by Lexi Whatever happened to just enjoying your time with him?

I never could figure that out. Most people my parents' age dated and didn't marry until they were older than Monster is. Yet everyone around me now is all in a hurry to get married and have kids. I'm all like "Why are you graduating with a technical degree if you're going to have kids on graduation and let it get eighteen+ years out of date?" General response: Because I want to.

Good luck Monster! Take it from me, a good friend is worth about as much and lasts longer than a 'significant other.'

If he hasn't expressed any interest in you by now, it's better to assume he never will and work on lessening your attachment to him. Including spending less time around him.

Monster, aren't you like 16? Take a step back, be a kid for a while, don't worry about relationships. Dear God, woman, you have your entire life to worry about that crap. If you don't want that, the taking your shirt off thing should do it, but then you may just be a friend w/benefits for him. You can't make him love you, not in a million years, so just relax and play video games or explore, or play w/dolls or whatever kids do now.

Posted by monsterBlah blah blah... My math tutor told me that the best marriages often start out as being friends. My question to you is: What can I do to get out of his friend zone and have him think of me as more than just a friend?

My question is: why is your math tutor giving you relationship advice.