This is a "just for fun" question that I've been talking with my friends about.

In a long-term relationship, do you think it is more important to have many things in common with your significant other, or have personalities that mesh really well? Obviously finding both is ideal, but if you HAD to pick just one...

Personality. Interests can change over time, but personalities are something people can be stuck with.

And if his and hers don't mesh very well...

Personality.

Personality, for sure.

I know my interests seem to wander all over the place. However when I'm seeing someone I generally take an interest in what they are doing, especially if I am not familiar with it and I would like to think that they have an interest in what I do.

Having different interests is good because it exposes me to new and different things. However, our personalities need to mesh really well because I can be a real stubborn S.O.B. when I want to...

depends on the personality first...

Definitely personality.

Certainly breast size. Like at least Dolly Parton.

Posted by MrMusik Personality, for sure. I know my interests seem to wander all over the place. However when I'm seeing someone I generally take an interest in what they are doing, especially if I am not familiar with it and I would like to think that they have an interest in what I do. Having different interests is good because it exposes me to new and different things. However, our personalities need to mesh really well because I can be a real stubborn S.O.B. when I want to...

Personality as well. Couldn't have said it better myself!

While the more "sensitive" thing to say is personality, I lump it into the same category as interests. Both are mutable, and subject to change. If you really want a relationship to last, you and your partner need to choose to be together. None of that, "we love each other and must be together" crap. It's work. It's compromise. No matter how many commonalities, in the end you are you and they are they. Two separate people. So you choose to build your lives together. It's all choice.

One tip though. I try to fall in love with my partner everyday. To see the new her that she is evolving into each chance I get.

^^ AWWWWW!!! Thats so cute!


I also think the personality one is sort of a no-brainer. I kind of enjoy having hobbies of my own to get some of my own time in.

However...it'd be AWESOME to find a girl who likes exploring mineshafts. *shrugs*

Personality does seem like a no brainer, but consider this: You meet someone, you get along really well on every level. But when it comes time to go out and do stuff, you can't agree on anything because they're hobbies bore you, your hobbies bore them.

Case in point; I was with someone a while ago who loved video games. I consider myself a "casual gamer" so sitting on my butt playing with a joy stick for hours isn't exactly my idea of fun. My biggest hobby (duh) is exploring. Exploring put him to sleep. Our differences in interests ultimately ended the relationship.

Posted by Neptune Case in point; I was with someone a while ago who loved video games. I consider myself a "casual gamer" so sitting on my butt playing with a joy stick for hours isn't exactly my idea of fun. My biggest hobby (duh) is exploring. Exploring put him to sleep. Our differences in interests ultimately ended the relationship.

Maybe spend time doing activities with them for the sake of spending time with them, over for the sake of playing the game or doing the activity.

I suppose if someone is hardcore at one thing and the other person is hardcore on another, it might be a little harder to find some common ground activity both can do and enjoy together.

Posted by Neptune Personality does seem like a no brainer, but consider this: You meet someone, you get along really well on every level. But when it comes time to go out and do stuff, you can't agree on anything because they're hobbies bore you, your hobbies bore them. Case in point; I was with someone a while ago who loved video games. I consider myself a "casual gamer" so sitting on my butt playing with a joy stick for hours isn't exactly my idea of fun. My biggest hobby (duh) is exploring. Exploring put him to sleep. Our differences in interests ultimately ended the relationship.

My partner has asthma, and is not exactly athletic. While see understands why I do it, it is not her thing. She likes hanging out in coffee shops, reading and writing. While I do love reading, I need to be active. As I said, I have made this work for 5 years. Our lack of mutual interests are not an issue. One just needs to find common interests. Keyword: FIND. Now, that said, video games are not a hobby.