Posted by KublaKhan STILL AWAKE THANKS.

Not a single wink of sleep at all. Zero. As awake now as I was in the moments leading up to the point when I almost fell asleep.

Posted by KublaKhan STILL AWAKE THANKS.

Not a single wink of sleep at all. Zero. As awake now as I was in the moments leading up to the point when I almost fell asleep.

Weddings...ahhh...
I went to a wedding on the weekend and I realized how much my marriage blows compared to other people. That and the fact that I ended up getting hit on by a male member of the wedding party (and he was gorgeous!). It just seems that instead of growing and gaining success in our lives, my partner just brings me down: constantly getting and then quitting jobs, lack of self esteem and no motivation or goals for the future. He wants to have kids, but I fucking don't want to; not if he continues to not care about anything at all. It's not like he was always like this; this shit started well into my 5 year marriage. I have good self-esteem, I dress up often enough and I have goals. I don't know what to do, but I feel that I am less and less attracted to him the more and more he pulls this shit.

Sorry for the rant. I'm just so tired, frustrated and need guidance?

Posted by KublaKhan ...and again.

...and again. Yep.

The fact that I haven't gotten a decent night's sleep in almost a year because I live with someone who refuses to understand the fact that I work 25 hours a week while in school year round, full time. I am exhausted all the time. No, it is not a joke when you apologize and giggle for waking me up at 4am for the billionth time when I have work all day, then school all evening and I'm doing 3 four month long courses in a month.

Laughing when I remind you that I work early in the morning or have school early in the morning at 1am and saying "you're trying" doesn't make it magically better. Coming home from the bar and blasting music, laughing, loud conversations, etc. Not appreciated.

I'm so fucking tired all the time and it's really, really starting to get to me. I hate Toronto for being so goddamned expensive. I really just want to go to school, work, do homework, and see my boyfriend in peace. There's no need for me to feel like fuck pie constantly because of the moron I live with. Our roommate that replaced the one who attacked me seems to understand this concept and he is 3 years younger than I, four younger than the idiot I live with.

Posted by vicexsquad Weddings...ahhh... I went to a wedding on the weekend and I realized how much my marriage blows compared to other people. That and the fact that I ended up getting hit on by a male member of the wedding party (and he was gorgeous!). It just seems that instead of growing and gaining success in our lives, my partner just brings me down: constantly getting and then quitting jobs, lack of self esteem and no motivation or goals for the future. He wants to have kids, but I fucking don't want to; not if he continues to not care about anything at all. It's not like he was always like this; this shit started well into my 5 year marriage. I have good self-esteem, I dress up often enough and I have goals. I don't know what to do, but I feel that I am less and less attracted to him the more and more he pulls this shit. Sorry for the rant. I'm just so tired, frustrated and need guidance?

As lye scent councillor, firs queshion, how old yoo?

Seriously though, I see you are young, but well past the late teens early twenties era. You are smart enough not to have kids with him, to 'cheer him up' . That's the most important issue, which you've got past.

Next: Lack of self esteem, mild depression, something missing? these are very important things to have to admit to ourselves. If he's not there, or not willing to 'look in the mirror' then I would recommend you gradually start letting him know you want to separate.

If you are all he has, and there is any chance he may have suicidal leanings, then counseling would likely be a good idea. This may take more than one attempt. Like finding a good mechanic, the first one is not always the right one.

You sound smart, vibrant, keen to get the most out of life. He's probably a decent dude, but (and I know personally, family, friends etc.) our past and life in general can be exhausting and overwhelming.

My sister was in a relationship like this years ago. Great guy, family liked him a lot, but... he just couldn't accept he was part of the problem. They separated amicably, which was a good thing. Hope things work out, questioning, honesty and facing your discontent are huge steps.

I strongly believe divorce is not a failure. It's having the strength to admit, 'it's over' we did our best, grew through the relationship, but it's in both our best interests to move on. Not saying you're at that point, but make a note of your post here, and read it again in six months. With counseling and an effort from both, you may get past this.

Posted by shadowedsmile The fact that I haven't gotten a decent night's sleep in almost a year because I live with someone who refuses to understand the fact that I work 25 hours a week while in school year round, full time. I am exhausted all the time. No, it is not a joke when you apologize and giggle for waking me up at 4am for the billionth time when I have work all day, then school all evening and I'm doing 3 four month long courses in a month.

I feel your pain...really. But if someone is waking you up at 4 AM, consider yourself lucky. I've been wide awake since 6 AM Monday morning.

Laughing when I remind you that I work early in the morning or have school early in the morning at 1am and saying "you're trying" doesn't make it magically better. Coming home from the bar and blasting music, laughing, loud conversations, etc. Not appreciated.

I feel your pain...really. Those noise cancelling headphones work like a charm. Melatonin is an over-the-counter fix that really, really works.

I'm so fucking tired all the time and it's really, really starting to get to me.

I feel your pain...really. Longest Awake Record for me was something like 3 weeks with a total of about (maybe) 5 hours of sleep. I could barely speak.

I hate Toronto for being so goddamned expensive.

I feel your pain...really. I hate Toronto for no particular reason at all. Never liked the place.

I really just want to go to school, work, do homework, and see my boyfriend in peace. There's no need for me to feel like fuck pie constantly because of the moron I live with. Our roommate that replaced the one who attacked me seems to understand this concept and he is 3 years younger than I, four younger than the idiot I live with.

I feel your pain...really. Living with an asshole who has no (zero) appreciation for what you're trying to do, and then more/less forcing you to accept their choices, sucks ass (and not in a good way). But trust me...this is generally the norm while you're in school. I guarantee that there are millions of people who are doing the very same thing. You'll get through this because (I can plainly tell) you're dedicated to the task, and your determination to focus and succeed will carry you far, far away from this moron who will (with little doubt) pass through life without ever having accomplished anything more than what they already are.

And on that note, I'd just like to point out that it's 3:30 AM Pacific Standard Time, and this whole silly fucking insomnia thing is really enjoying a hearty good laugh at my expense.

Dealing with insurance companies for any reason.

Posted by KublaKhan I feel your pain...really. But if someone is waking you up at 4 AM, consider yourself lucky. I've been wide awake since 6 AM Monday morning. I feel your pain...really. Those noise cancelling headphones work like a charm. Melatonin is an over-the-counter fix that really, really works.

I have a lot of sleeping issues, so I totally get where you're coming from too! Headphones wouldn't do me any good, because I can't sleep with them on, and I've tried Melatonin but it doesn't do anything for me. I had a prescription for Ativan to help me sleep for a while but my doctor isn't inclined to keep me on it consistently, as I started taking it for insomnia (staying up for days, longest was a week and a bit) when I was around 13. I'm 23 now. The abuse potential and the fact your body builds a tolerance pretty quickly means it's not a real solution.

It takes me a lifetime to fall asleep, and when someone wakes me up, it means a nightmare getting back to sleep. But I'm absolutely terrible at sleeping, so things need to be very specific...having something on my head would just annoy me. I need pillows to feel just right, etc. I'm not one of those people that can just sleep haha.

I feel your pain...really. I hate Toronto for no particular reason at all. Never liked the place.

I hated Toronto before I moved here, too...but for the degree I want it's basically Vancouver, Toronto or Halifax. Toronto was the best option for me right now. But, I'm at the best place for what I want to do, so living in Toronto and moving 200km away from my boyfriend is something that I just have to suck it up over. Hopefully it's worth it in the end, haha.

I feel your pain...really. Living with an asshole who has no (zero) appreciation for what you're trying to do, and then more/less forcing you to accept their choices, sucks ass (and not in a good way). But trust me...this is generally the norm while you're in school. I guarantee that there are millions of people who are doing the very same thing. You'll get through this because (I can plainly tell) you're dedicated to the task, and your determination to focus and succeed will carry you far, far away from this moron who will (with little doubt) pass through life without ever having accomplished anything more than what they already are.

I think bandi is tired of hearing me bitch everyday about this person, lol. She keeps whining to me about how hard done by she is by the world, meanwhile everything that's wrong is directly her fault (such as failing classes, not being able to find a job, not being able to drive, etc.) but yet her parents pay for everything (as soon as I said I wanted a car my parents said "the car and your insurance is in your name, we aren't paying for it. It's your responsibility"). And then she calls me spoiled because I have a Volkswagen. A car that I have to work so much while in school in order to be able to afford to drive it. I've explained countless times that my car is the reason I work 20-25 hours while having a full course load in University.

I've made owning vehicles, having my license, etc priorities in my life and have worked my ass off for these things. Instead of moving out after high school and fucking around for a bunch of years I chose to work to pay off my car before doing two college programs before coming here. She just can't understand the concept of life is what we make it. We both come from middle class families, our parents have known each other for a while, if anything she has the advantage because she's essentially an only child (much older brother) where as I have 3 other siblings to share resources with.

Ugh, now I'm ranting again! Thanks for the thoughtful response though Sometimes it's nice to know at least someone understands how frustrating it is. I'm starting to look at single bedroom apartments and trying to figure out if I can realistically afford to do this when the lease comes up in August. I can't go another year without getting sleep...I'll snap. And I don't have the patience for her anymore. I'll be starting 3rd year in January when I should actually be halfway through 2nd year (I'm taking max course loads and going year round to finish this program early). Gonna be brutal, but it'll be worth it in the end

Posted by A. Lien Seriously though, I see you are young, but well past the late teens early twenties era. You are smart enough not to have kids with him, to 'cheer him up' . That's the most important issue, which you've got past. Next: Lack of self esteem, mild depression, something missing? these are very important things to have to admit to ourselves. If he's not there, or not willing to 'look in the mirror' then I would recommend you gradually start letting him know you want to separate. If you are all he has, and there is any chance he may have suicidal leanings, then counseling would likely be a good idea. This may take more than one attempt. Like finding a good mechanic, the first one is not always the right one. You sound smart, vibrant, keen to get the most out of life. He's probably a decent dude, but (and I know personally, family, friends etc.) our past and life in general can be exhausting and overwhelming.

I'm 28, and we've been married for just over 5 years. He has no suicidal leanings what so ever; I know that for sure.
I try and try to talk to him about helping him through his issues, but nothing works.

Alzheimer's.

_{Also: migraines.}

That fucking goof juice monkey with the massively over-developed lats, traps, pecs, so-so abs, biceps, triceps, skinny little boy legs (shaved), stupid half-assed mohawk, badly-rendered tattoos, fake-n-bake tan, completely obvious press-on teeth ten shades whiter than anything natural, bullshit dogtags (Canadian tags look NOTHING like those, asshole) who told his daughter these exact words:

"If you don't go down that water slide RIGHT NOW...do you hear me? RIGHT NOW...we're never coming back to this pool ever again. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?"

Kid was about seven, and she started to cry, and I felt like pulling out the heat and shooting that cocksucker right between his fucking eyes.

Right in her face, like he was confronting a drunk at a bar. Pointing his finger, snarling and squinting and so on, like a motherfucker needing a really serious lesson in 'appropriate motivational techniques suitable for small children.'

HEY COCKSUCKER, I hope your kid kills you in your sleep, and gets off on a legal technicality, and goes on to fortune and fame telling the world what a miserable, horrible parent you were.

A sexy guy from Michigan with a sexy accent whom I met at a concert last weekend and I will never see him again... Fuck.

Posted by vicexsquad Weddings...ahhh... I went to a wedding on the weekend and I realized how much my marriage blows compared to other people. That and the fact that I ended up getting hit on by a male member of the wedding party (and he was gorgeous!). It just seems that instead of growing and gaining success in our lives, my partner just brings me down: constantly getting and then quitting jobs, lack of self esteem and no motivation or goals for the future. He wants to have kids, but I fucking don't want to; not if he continues to not care about anything at all. It's not like he was always like this; this shit started well into my 5 year marriage. I have good self-esteem, I dress up often enough and I have goals. I don't know what to do, but I feel that I am less and less attracted to him the more and more he pulls this shit. Sorry for the rant. I'm just so tired, frustrated and need guidance?

I hear you.

My wife has changed over the years. She no longer has fun doing the things we used to do together. Back in the day.... She explored with me, climbed, rapelled, rode a sportbike, loved music, drinking, going out, and sex. Now she just wants to sit at home and watch television, and that sucks too because we only have an antenna with two fuzzy stations. She is so tired all the time and after work just wants to sit around and do nothing.

Posted by Nvr2loud I hear you. My wife has changed over the years. She no longer has fun doing the things we used to do together. Back in the day.... She explored with me, climbed, rapelled, rode a sportbike, loved music, drinking, going out, and sex. Now she just wants to sit at home and watch television, and that sucks too because we only have an antenna with two fuzzy stations. She is so tired all the time and after work just wants to sit around and do nothing.

+1.

Posted by Nvr2loud I hear you. My wife has changed over the years. She no longer has fun doing the things we used to do together. Back in the day.... She explored with me, climbed, rapelled, rode a sportbike, loved music, drinking, going out, and sex. Now she just wants to sit at home and watch television, and that sucks too because we only have an antenna with two fuzzy stations. She is so tired all the time and after work just wants to sit around and do nothing.

My husband also likes to sit at home and just watch tv. There's just no fun anymore...

Being hit by some asshole when in my parked car trying to put my insurance and stuff back in my glovebox after renewing my plates and having him deny doing it and refusing to give me his information and trying to intimidate me, and claiming he doesn't have time for this.

I asked him repeatedly for his info and even followed him into the Service Ontario place to ask him for his info, then telling him I'll just go get his plate and call the cops instead. Then he came out trying to block my photos and getting more aggressive and trying to intimidate me further.

So I called the cops. Long day of paperwork and such but he'll be getting a summons to go talk to the North York police (it was the closest collision reporting centre, since they closed the Etobicoke one...only learned after driving there haha) and will have to answer to fleeing the scene of an accident, which is a serious offence in Ontario.

Guy fucked with the wrong "cute little blonde girl" as the woman who came out to make sure I was ok called me (she was a witness to what happened inside the Service Ontario building and even left the line to make sure he wasn't going to do anything stupid).

3.5 years in an abusive relationship and dealing with shitty men who don't want women's help and treat us as inferiors/try to intimidate to get what they want in the automotive/retail industry has given me a tough skin and the confidence to stick up to these assholes and no longer get intimidated I suppose that's the positive spin to this situation.

+1 You did great. Not much worse than cranked up clowns (either gender) who won't own their stuff, or admit their screw ups, and think the world revolves around their stink. Good to stand up to them, it's empowering, as you've proven again

Thanks

The real irony of the situation is that he kept telling me he doesn't have time for this and has work to do....it's going to take a lot more time out of his day to drive up to North York and deal with the police up there! Had he just given me his info I'd have likely just let it go. (Why won't someone hit my front end? That's twice in two weeks my rear bumper has been hit! My front end has a severe case of road acne and needs a paint job haha)