I can't find the writing board anymore, and this is kinda car related, and I value ya'lls opinion. I do some writing when I feel like it, and this is a story I finished. I'm gonna post some of it, to get ya'lls feedback and opinion. Thanks, you won't hurt my feelings, I'm not really a writer or story teller.

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Exit 238

By Jeepdave






Julie had made this trip many times before. One thousand, nine hundred, and fourteen miles. Distance from her home in Reno Nevada and her college the University of Illinois. It usually took her four days to complete it, but then there was that time she did it in three. Lots of coffee that trip. The thought made her smile as she watched the vast, empty, cold landscape in front of her fly by. She was just over halfway, not too far from Walcott Wyoming. She wasn’t planning on coming home for Christmas break, but decided at the last minute it would be a nice surprise for her parents. They had put so much into her education and helped her anytime she needed it, she thought the least she could do is be there during the holidays. It was cold today though, according to her overhead console thermometer it was 31 outside. And gray. So gray. She hadn’t checked the weather but wasn’t too worried, her parents had gotten her this car, a used Jeep Grand Cherokee as a graduation present and it was four wheel drive.


Then the snow came. Not too bad at first, but she could tell it was sticking. As the wind blew across the plains, little white fingers began to reach across the road. She was good at lying to herself, that much was for sure. She thought, “It won’t be bad, I’ll get past Walcott and see if I can find a place to stop for the night, head out in the morning.” A few minutes had passed, she glanced up at the temperature, 27. “Damn” she thought, “Its dropping quick.” Now a nice blanket of white had formed across the road, windswept and forming small drifts. She reached up and turned down the radio to a low murmur, too distracting, her knuckles whitened as she gripped the wheel tighter. She kept her eyes straight ahead, wondering if it was going to let up soon, maybe she could drive through it. She had to make it at least to exit 238. She couldn’t remember if there was anything on that exit, but she could get off the interstate see if anyone knew anything about the weather. There always a gas station she laughed. With bad coffee. The wind was blowing so hard she could barely see ahead of her, she reached down and put the Jeep into four wheel drive, just to be safe. She slowed down to about 45, and kept her eyes out. She didn’t like to admit to herself but she was getting very nervous now. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.





“SHOT DOWNNNNNNNN IN A BLAZE OF GLORYYYY” Screamed her phone. “SHIT!!”, Julie cursed as she reached over for her phone, knocking it into the passenger seat. She reached over, trying to see who would be calling her now, as all her friends in school knew she was going home. The Jeep hurtled along at 45, drifting onto the snow covered break down lane. She grabbed the charger cord and started to reel the phone in. She grabbed it and silenced it, her mom. Of course. She just let it go to voicemail. She looked back up and panicked. As she was drifting off the right side of the road. “SHIT SHIT SHIT” she gritted as she pulled the wheel hard back to the left. The Jeep slid around, she fought the wheel, then let go, hoping it would correct itself. The wheel miraculously came back to center, she gripped it again and slowed down again, now going just 30, she breathed a sigh of relief. “Damn, that could have been bad” she said to no one in particular. She glanced up at the temperature reading again, 17. “Holy hell” she thought, its dropping. It seemed to be snowing harder, she could feel the wind pushing her all over the highway. She wondered though where all the traffic was. She hadn’t passed an east bound car for over an hour, they may have closed the highway. If they closed it eastbound, then they must have closed it west. Probably back at Laramie.


About 5 minutes later, she noticed it. At first she thought her mind was playing tricks on her. But it was really there, a car. Or truck. The headlights were rather dim, but there was still a gray glow in the sky so she really couldn’t tell. Looked to be about half a mile behind her, as it would disappear over the crest of the rolling hills out here. And the apex of the long sweeping curves. The wind was far worse than it had been, but now she felt a little better. At least she wasn’t the ONLY one out in this mess. And if the worse happened, at least there was another human being there. Another person. That alone relieved her. She felt more at ease, and bumped her speed up to a blistering 45. Well, blistering for her anyway. She glanced back up at the temperature again, 08. She had NEVER seen cold like that. She noticed her feet were getting cold, even though she had the heat on full blast and the defroster. She notice ice had started forming on her side windows. Never thought it would be that cold coming through here. She had seen snow, and cold temperatures in Reno, but nothing like this. Even when she came through here last winter, it was in the 20’s.

i shitcanned the writing board.

Posted by Samurai i shitcanned the writing board.

Ah, wondered where that thing went ,


Here is a few more sections of the story...........





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She glanced in the rearview mirror. The car had gotten much closer, maybe a hundred yards away. It was getting darker, and she could tell the lights were much dimmer than they should be. And its big. Must be a truck she thought. Or maybe a van. Round headlights too she thought. Must be old. She just kept heading up the interstate. She hadn’t seen a mile marker post for a while, but with the snow, wind, and her laser like attention to the road in front of her since the little spin she hadn’t really been looking. “ This is taking forever” she thought, I should be at the next exit by now. She started getting nervous again, thinking maybe she missed it.

Impossible she thought. I wouldn’t have missed an entire exit. She was starting to regret her visitor now. The van was closer. Real close. Actually much too close. “Back the fuck off asshole” she said again, this time to the van behind her. She was worried that he would hit her if she messed up again. And that’s all she needs, a wrecked car in the middle of a blizzard miles from help with limited cell service. She glanced down at her phone, the red light shined back at her. No service. Great. She looked ahead, and saw a ramp, not 20 yards ahead. Shit, almost missed it. She guided her suv up the onramp. Then she noticed it wasn’t the exit. It was a rest area. Of course. She thought well at least I’ll get Mr. Follow too Close off my ass. She glanced up at the mirror. No. Oh, no. No fucking way. The van was still behind her. “Don’t panic” she thought, maybe he is just pulling off to wait out the storm, or take a piss. Who knows. She pulled into one of the parking spaces to the left, and put the Jeep in park. As she sat there idling she noticed the van pull up behind her. And stop. Blocking her in. Not good. Not good. Not good. The van sat there, it was loud, she could here it over the wind. It didn’t sound powerful, just badly taken care of. She could see it well out of the side view mirror. The dim light of the rest area lights lit up the van well. It was defiantly black. And beat. Looked old, 60’s maybe? . It was a panel van, a work van of some sort she noted, no windows on the side. It looked rough. She heard a loud creak, and saw the van rock. She looked in the rearview mirror and saw the door of the van swing shut. She could see a scripted writing on the door, in chrome. E….E something. She sat there, scared. Not sure what to do, then she noticed the man walking up her drivers side. He was wearing an old and torn heavy coat, boots, and a wide brimmed hat he was having to hold on with one of his hands against the win.

He stopped at her window. She looked at her phone, pretending not to notice him. He reached out with his hand and rapped on the window with his knuckles. No gloves. His hands must be frozen. She looked up and gave a nervous smile. She put down the phone, making sure he could see she had one, and rolled down the window about two inches. “Hello” she said, “Can I help you sir?” As he looked at her his expression did not change, he looked beaten. Like a man who went to work everyday and hated his job, then went home and hated his life. “Hey, I’m sorry, but I need you to come with me, something has happened.” the stranger said against the wind. She looked at him and let out a nervous laugh. “I’m sorry, do I know you?” she asked, trying not to show how terrified she was. “No, ma’am but you must come with me, I’m sorry but I cannot let you proceed any further. There was an accident.” “Um, unless you’re the police, I’m not getting out of my car, so if you don’t mind please move your van so I can get out, please?” Now she was completely about to lose it. “ Julie, you have to come with me. You will die if you don’t, I promise you, I hate doing this, but its your only chance, you must trust me.”. She looked at him, her eyes wide. “ How the fuck do you know my name, who the hell are you?!!?” She screamed at him. “Please, just come with me Julie, its cold out here and I’m not going to physically force you. I hate that. Just please, come with me.”


Julie was freaked out. She didn’t know what to do but she sure as hell wasn’t getting in the official rapist van of the Midwest. She rolled back up her window with out a word. She looked in front of her, didn’t look to bad, but what if she got stuck, no way she could get her self out before he got to her. The stranger stood there shaking his head. “Every damned time” he thought and started walking back to his van. She saw him turn his back and start back to his van. This is it, she thought. Now or never. Victim or victor. She put the Jeep in reverse and floored it. The stranger didn’t even flinch as the suv came within inches of him. The Jeep plowed into the front fender and door of the van pushing it to the side, she threw it back in drive and took off for the onramp. “YES” she screamed to herself. “GO BACK TO FUCKING GOATS ASSHOLE!!” She screamed even thought she knew he couldn’t hear her. Exit 238. There will be people at exit 238. And around here there will be people who have guns. He won’t follow she thought. No way he is that dumb. But how did he know my name? Why didn’t he just pull me from the car? She was confused but she knew one thing, no way was she getting in his van on her own free will. That would be suicide. As she pulled back on the highway she looked in her mirror, no sign of him. Excellent she thought. He is probably looking at the damage she did to his van. She hoped she had fucked it up good. What if he knew her parents? What if he was really there to help? Stop. Stop it. Your already trying to rationalize this to yourself, she thought to herself. Just get to the exit, find people, call the law. That’s your goal.

The man stood by his battered van. Its always the same. Always. They never have the faith. Oh well, the chase is on. He stepped up into the van, closed the door, and went after his prey.

Julie was starting to relax, she had done pretty well calming herself down and then it all went to shit. Headlights. Dim. Round. He was back. And catching up fast. She threw caution to the wind and accelerated up to 60 mph through the drifting snow. Looking back at the van which was now less than 50 feet behind her. A momentary lack of attention and she saw the headlights disappear in the rearview mirror. Shit. She was sliding sideways again but she wasn’t getting it back this time. The Jeep slid off the left side of the interstate and slid down the slope of the median backwards. She came to a rest, upright and rattled, staring at the van, now sitting still, the wind blowing the steam of the tailpipe around as it sat there idling. He didn’t get out, he just sat there, staring out the drivers side window as the wind whipped around the van. Waiting, hoping, that she would come and ask him for help, that she would get past her fears. No dice, she stared back, wondering why he didn’t come after her. Why he didn’t get out of the van. This was the perfect opportunity. She sat there for what seemed like days, wondering what to do next, when a voice in her head screamed, floor it, get out of this ditch, your not far from your goal now, you can’t give up. She did just that, the engine of the Jeep roared as it clawed and slid its way up the median and back onto I-80, just feet from the front of the van. The stranger just watched her, and cursed the fact that she was once again on the run.

The conclusion..................



Please be brutal on this fellas, my wife thinks I should submit it as a short story or something, I personally don't think its anywhere near polished enough.

Thanks.

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Back on the road again, headed west she came up over the hill and saw it. Lights! The exit! Finally, civilization. She kept edging up her speed, and once again, the van was gaining. She kept her eyes on the goal, now only 200 yards away, she started heading towards the exit, turning on her turn signal out of habit. As she started heading down ramp, she got loose once again, spun around completely and hit the guardrail on the right side of the ramp backwards. This was bad. Really bad. She felt herself get thrust back into the seat as the back of the jeep crumpled into the rail. The rear window busted, and the Jeep bounced back out into the middle of the ramp. As she came to a stop, she saw the headlights bearing down on her from the interstate. She closed her eyes, gripped the wheel and prepared for impact.


It never came. She felt the cold air drifting in from the broken rear window. The wind rocked the Jeep. She could easily hear the loud, rough idle of the van. Idle? She opened her eyes, the van sat at the top of the exit ramp. She looked at it, no longer scared, but confused. She put the Jeep in park, and waited to see what happened next, even though her mind screamed at her to drive away. The drivers side door of the van opening snapped her out of the trance. She frantically pulled the Jeep into drive and looked again, but he wasn’t coming toward her. The stranger was just standing beside the open door of the van. Staring at her. She started getting angry now. Really angry, she rolled down the window of the Jeep and screamed “ What the hell do you want!!” The stranger, straining to be heard over the wind and blowing snow yelled back “You, to do the right thing, and come with me. I told you, there has been an accident. You must come with me.” She looked at the man, who was only about 30 feet from her and felt less threatened, but she knew he wasn’t going to get her in that van. The stranger spoke again, “You have half an hour, I’ll be right here. After that, I’m leaving.” And the stranger stepped back up into his van and shut the door.


She rolled up the window wondering what the hell the man meant. He still sat there, in his battered van. She put the Jeep in gear, and pulled down the ramp toward the light that had attracted her before. It was a truck stop. Not a chain place, more of a mom and pop type of deal. She limped the injured Jeep into the parking lot and parked 2 spaces from the door. There were no other cars in the lot, but looking through the windows that spanned the entire front of the café area she noticed it had many customers, looked to be at least 30 people in there. Sane people she hoped. She got out of her car, and walked toward the front door, as she pushed it open, she welcomed the warmth and stillness of the air. She walked up to the counter, and yelled to the man behind the counter, “Please help me, I’m being chased!”



The man behind the counter barely looked up, a couple folks nervously laughed. “What the hell is wrong with you people! Call the fucking police, I’m being chased by a lunatic in a van for fucks sake!” The man behind the counter looked up at her, “Hey there, my name is James. Now just calm down, your safe now. But we need to clear some things up for you. Go over and talk to Grayson over there, he will set you straight.” She wanted to run back out the door, run back to her Jeep and see if she could make it to another exit, but she felt the answer was in this diner. Again, her mind told her to get the hell out of there, but she knew in her gut that she need to talk to the man called Grayson. She walked over toward the man that the counter fellow had pointed at. He was a large man, gray hair peaking out from a tattered Purina Feed ball cap. But he looked kind. She walked over to the booth where the man was sitting with a cup of coffee. Only about 4 minutes had passed since her last encounter with the stranger. She didn’t know how much more weird shit she could deal with tonight. But she decided to find out.

Grayson just looked at her for a few moments after she sat down. He looked over at James, “Hey, would you get this young lady a cup of coffee.” She shook her head as to say no, but he looked at her and said “Your gonna want it, how do you take it?” “ Lots of cream, lots of sugar” The old man looked over at James again, “You hear her?” “Yeah” said James. “Ok, miss. While he is getting that, let me clear up this fella in the van for ya. We have all encountered him. Everyone of us. And we all misunderstood his intentions.” She cocked her head slightly to the side “What the hell do you mean misunderstood his intentions? The son of a bitch ran me off the road, he is trying to kill me!” “Miss” said Grayson “Did he once touch you? Did he once force you out of your car, even though he had ample opportunity?” “No.” She said, “But what the hell is he doing out there? He is going to get someone killed. And why havn’t you called the police yet?” “Miss, first off, trust me, he isn’t going to get anyone killed here” he chuckled. “And second, there is no phone here. Look around you for a minute, tell me what you see.” She glanced around, many different people in the restaurant. All different walks of life, two booths down from them was a man in a suit. Behind him, a older couple who must still think it’s the early 70’s based on the way they were dressed. Over on the other side of the counter were several different people, all seemed to be dressed from different decades. 60’s, 70’s, 80’s and 90’s.

“I don’t understand, what’s going on here?” “The man you have been running from is a transporter. He brings souls to where they need to be. Miss, I don’t know what has happened to you, all of us in here do not know what happened to us either, but you are most likely dead. We are in a state of limbo, we cannot leave. I see my old truck out there right now.” He motioned out the window to an empty space. “But I can’t leave here in it. Oh, I can go out, start it up, and head up the exit ramp, but as I reach the top I am suddenly headed back down toward Old Peterson road out there. There is no where I can go to leave here. Now, its not too bad here, its warm inside while it’s a snowy, windy, mess out there, not bad at all.”
He continued “But honestly, I would almost rather be judge and sent into damnation than stay here. We have no sense of time really, I don’t remember if I have eaten, or if I have slept. I don’t even remember if I have gotten up to take a piss. My coffee cup is always at the same level. I have no idea if I had this conversation with you already 50 times. The only way we can even remotely have an idea about the time we have spent here is when a new guest arrives. Would you mind telling me what year it is?” She sat there, stunned. Not sure of what to make of this. “Um, its ah, its 2009.” The old mans face dropped. He couldn’t believe it. Last customer they had was back in 1992. He looked her right in the eye “Miss, I have been here since the summer of 64, at least as far as I can remember. Well, I guess you can pick yourself out a booth, there is some nice folks in here, you will enjoy all their stories, but after a while you will start to forget if they are yours or theirs” She looked at him, almost ready to cry. It had been 18 minutes. “The man” she said. “The man said he would wait half an hour. What did that mean?” The old mans eyes lit up. “That means you still have a chance! Go, go now. Get in his van. Trust me, no matter what fate he has for you, its better than the one your choosing now. Please, no one has ever said he would wait. You must catch him before its too late.”

She didn’t know what to do, what to say. The man looked at her “Go! Goddammit, get out of here! NOW!” She got up, almost falling, ran past James holing her coffee, pushed open the door to the café, and ran to her now battered Jeep. Start she thought. Start for the love of God start. The Jeep roared to life, she put it in reverse and slung the Jeep around toward the exit. James looked over to Grayson, “Do you think she will make it?” “I sure as hell hope so, I would like someone to beat this shitty cosmic game.” The folks inside the diner went back to the polite conversation, as they had been doing for decades. As she pulled back out on the road she pulled up to the exit and headed up the wrong way to I80 West. Two headlights stared back at her, he was still there. She never thought she would be happy about that. 27 minutes. She pulled up to the front of the van and slid to a stop. As she got out, the vans driver side door opened, once again. The stranger stepped out. “You coming or not?” he said. “I don’t have a choice do I.” She replied. “Sure you do, that’s what it’s all about. Choices.” “ I’m coming.” she replied.

She walked over to the passenger side of the van, reached for the handle and opened the door. She noticed the script on the door again, Econoline. Huh, she thought. Wondered what that said. One mystery down. She got into the passenger side of the van as the stranger was closing his door. She reached over to pull her door shut, and noticed two threaded shafts where the window crank and door handle use to be and hesitated, she looked over at the man again. He just looked over at her and said “Sometimes people decide to leave after they have made the commitment to come with me. Its just insurance.” She looked back at the door, knowing once she closed it, short of breaking the window, only he could open it. She sighed, reached out and closed the door. The stranger put the van in gear, and slowly swung the van around, heading east in the west bound lane.


“So, what’s the deal? Am I dead? Are you, like, an angel?” Julie asked breaking the silence. The stranger replied “Your not dead, not yet. And no, I’m not an angel. I simply have a job to do. I have a debt to pay. Some people don’t get the second chance I have been afforded, so I do my job.” She stared at him, though it didn’t seem to bother him. She thought for a second, well, he is probably use to it. “So, um, do you have a name?” He replied, “Frank, Frank Patterson.” Short and to the point she thought. “So,” She continued, “How does all this work. And what accident are you talking about? I don’t remember any accidents.” He looked over at her, first time since he started driving, “You didn’t regain control the first time you lost it on the interstate. You actually rolled your car over. A plow driver came upon you a few minutes after, in fact the EMS has just arrived. You have a pulse. But your fading. You injured your head pretty badly. I am trying to get you back, because your time is not scheduled to be up. But I don’t know if we will make it.” She just sat there, not sure what to feel, what to think. It was all so surreal. “The people at the café, do you” He cut her off. “Never been there, I’m not allowed down that ramp. Those are people I couldn’t help. People I failed. You see, there are places like that all over the world. Places where lost souls gather, they are not necessarily bad people, but they are not going to make it any further. That is their eternity.” She mulled it over, trying to think of questions to ask, but drawing a blank. She looked behind her and noticed the back of the van was blocked off by a large piece of wood painted black. She didn’t know what to say, she asked “So, what’s with the wood?” This caught the stranger off guard, he looked over at her, kinda confused. “Well, honestly, its easier to heat the van without having to heat the entire cargo area.” He continued, “That’s the first time anyone has asked me about that since 1964.” For the first time, she saw a small smile form upon the strangers face.

“So, how many have there been, you know, before me?” He didn’t answer, he just kept staring ahead. She pushed on, “Will I remember any of this if I, um, survive?” “Miss” he said, “I am trying my best to save your life, I already saved your soul, so technically, I did my job. All these questions are breaking my concentration.” She looked over at him, “Well I am so sorry but I’m just caught a little off guard here buddy, I was just on my” She stopped, it finally sunk in. She may never see her parents again, her friends, anyone she knows. She tried to hide it but tears started running down her face. He looked over at her, “Oh, come on. Don’t start that. Jesus. Maybe if you hadn’t kept running you wouldn’t be in a race for your life right now.” “ Don’t give me that SHIT!” She yelled at him. “Who in their right mind would get into a van with the way you were acting. Being all cryptic and shit asshole. Where do you get off trying to blame ME for this!” She was breathing hard. She was pissed. He kept looking ahead “Excuse me miss, but I’m not the one who wrecked her Jeep am I. Look, if you survive this, you may have some memory of what occurred. Are you going to tell everyone what happened? About all of this? What would be stranger, me asking you to come with me because there was an accident or me telling you that , oh, I’m sorry, but your hanging in the balance of life and death and since I’m playin the Grim Reaper today how bout you come with me and we will get this all sorted out.” He got agitated. “ Look, this isn’t an easy job, I am not allowed to touch you, I am not allowed to convince you, I have to get you from where your going back to where you need to be. It’s a shitty job but its what I have to do. I don’t like it, but I don’t have a choice, YOU DO! So please lady, cut me some slack. I didn’t have to give you any extra time when we got to the exit, but I figured I would be nice and see if we can let you enjoy your life. You want to go back? Fine. I’ll turn it around right now.” She sat there stunned. “I’m sorry, its, its just been so much to deal with all at one time ya know.” “I know,” The man replied. “Just trust me ok, its all about faith. So please, just trust me.” She sat there for a couple minutes. They rode in silence. “The wood, its not just to keep it warm in here is it?” He looked over at her, “No. It isn’t.” “Then why..” “Some people do bad things in life. I cannot allow them to make it to the exit. They MUST be judge. So those people, those people I CAN force.” She nodded. They rode in silence again.


She saw the lights first. The red, and amber flashing lights up ahead. Looked like spastic Christmas lights. Then she saw her Jeep. A mangled mess of metal, the paramedics were just now lifting someone up on the stretcher. Her. She looked over at him, “Can, can they see us?” “No” He replied. “No, they can’t. I’ll pull you up close, you can return to your body by simply laying down on it. I wish you the best of luck, and a long life. She just sat there, the man pulled up about twenty feet from the ambulance, stopped the van and got out. She started to feel sick. It was so twisted to know that you might die, in just a few moments. She was startled when the man opened her door. He looked over at her, “You ready? There is a bit of a time limit.” “Yeah, I’m ready.” She said. She stepped out of the van, and started walking over to her, body. It felt weird. She say them working on her, struggling to keep her body alive. She turned back, the man was still standing next to her open door. “Hey! One more question.” “WHAT!” he yelled back, against the snow and wind. “What’s with the van?”. For the second time that night, and in a long time, he smiled a little bit. “Company car.” And with that, he, and the van, faded into the blowing snow.

I think it's great! I would definately submit it! It could use just a tiny bit of polishing with punctuation, but as far as the basic story, it's awesome! Very well written.

Posted by MustangGina I think it's great! I would definately submit it! It could use just a tiny bit of polishing with punctuation, but as far as the basic story, it's awesome! Very well written.

Thanks Gina, and come on guys, if ya read it leave a note. I see its had 38 views lol so tell me to suck canal water I don't care but I need Critic. I won't get better without it. So please drop a line on it. I have about 10 more stories stuck in my head I need to get out, and critic on this one will help on the rest. Thanks!

Just read the conclusion and liked it. As said, minor polishing is needed. Your story is all yours, but it sort of has a Twilight Zone, Stephen King, and Beetlejuice feel. Sometimes in films they show the ending first, then what led up to it. I'll read the whole story later.

I should probably be more direct here; meaning to test your story against every thing you have ever read or film watched or story heard. They say there are only ten? (can't remember the amount) stories that always get retold, but if the characters and details are changed (and creative and original enough) then it becomes an original work.

Many films of course are almost like a remake of another. There's the famous Duel by Spielberg, then Black Cadillac. Duel is a classic of all time. Black Cadillac was okay. (big thanks to Randy Quaid)

It's weird, I wrote a short story years ago, it had the whole concept of Being John Malkovich. I mean the basic concept of going through a door, then ending up in another place. That concept was probably done centuries ago, but sometimes our original ideas have been done before. Again, details, tweaking and we own it.

Good luck, you could submit it to a collection of short stories. There used to be a book called Story, it was published 4 times a year. Or in something similar on the web. Hope this rant was not too simplistic sounding, I'm not a published fiction writer, only had a few newspaper stories on architecture published years ago.

If you want me to do some copy editing on it, let me know. I used to do it for "Legendary Ford" when it was around and I can get an editor to look it over for you too.

too many words.

Posted by Durdan too many words.

I'll work on a pop up version just for you Durdan.

I like it, but it definitely needs some clean-up.

Specifically, "your" vs. "you're"
Learn it, live it, love it.

Had someone approach me about including this in a book of short stories. Dunno if it is legit. Anyone know anything about the world of publishing. The Email I got did NOT look official at all. Dunno how to approach it........

What company?

I went round and round with a company a few years ago...they were willing to buy what I had, but only if I did everything according to what they wanted. I tried to do the rewrite, but it just didn't work. So in my own best interests, I told them to shove it and kept my own stuff. Only to find out later, they were just gonna take what I had, copyright it themselves and sell it to another company. Basically it would have been legal theft.

Don't sign anything and I wouldn't send them anything until you're certain it's a real legit company. Until then, get your own copyrights. The government can actually do this for you fairly cheaply. It costs 35 dollars for one item for online filing. At least this way, you'll know it's yours and any profits from it are yours legally.

http://www.copyright.gov/eco/

On the whole, I liked it..... but,

I think the whole scenario at the diner was resolved too fast, the beans were spilled too quickly if you will.

This seemed to cause the rest of the story to just taper off, as once Grayson explained a couple things, one can assume the outcome from that point.

Perhaps being more vague in the diner or having some other outcome at the end would make it better.

Of course thats just one readers opinion. I do like your writing style and I do think it was well presented.

Thanks for sharing!


Edit: I just realized that this is an old thread, forgive me if the criticism is no longer requested.

Criticism is always wanted! I to have some issues with my ending. Oh, and thanks for the advice Shael. He sent another Email claiming to be with Wrongers Publishing. Can't find info for it on the web and when I asked for a contact number he gave me another line about they only use the web for contact. And now won't answer emails so I'm calling BS on him. Maybe he wanted it, maybe he didn't. I dunno nor do I care lol. Oh, he did include a "offer" of $25 for the rights to use the story. I don't need $25 that bad

(I'm not a lawyer, so ymmv, don't listen to me... etc. etc...)

Technically, you automatically have a copyright on anything you write as long as you can prove that you wrote it before someone else. So, by publishing it on this site, you have a whole stack of witnesses that read your story before you sold it to someone else.

The issue usually comes with trying to prove that you actually did write something before someone else. So, date your work, folks... keep backup copies of old work so you can show when you started it and how it progressed as you modified drafts of it.

Good luck and watch out for the snakes in the grass, they are not all nice.

Posted by MrMusik (I'm not a lawyer, so ymmv, don't listen to me... etc. etc...) Technically, you automatically have a copyright on anything you write as long as you can prove that you wrote it before someone else. So, by publishing it on this site, you have a whole stack of witnesses that read your story before you sold it to someone else. The issue usually comes with trying to prove that you actually did write something before someone else. So, date your work, folks... keep backup copies of old work so you can show when you started it and how it progressed as you modified drafts of it. Good luck and watch out for the snakes in the grass, they are not all nice.

A very dear friend of mine preaches something called "CYA"...which stands for "cover your ass". That's why I would pay for the US copyright service through the government...CYA.