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UER Forum > Private Boards Index > Relationships > Is it ok to call CPS/DHS on your relatives? (Viewed 2330 times)
Neptune 


Location: Maine
Gender: Female
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The Albino Explorer

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Is it ok to call CPS/DHS on your relatives?
< on 9/15/2011 6:25 AM >
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I am seriously considering calling CPS on my aunt, who also happens to be my neighbor.

Without getting into too much detail, my aunt is a hoarder. Not quite as bad as you see on the hoarding shows, I mean, there isn't floor to ceiling junk, though there is A LOT of junk. Up until recently, the mess has been mostly junk or random items she's picked up from Goodwill or The Christmas Tree Shoppe, and has mostly been contained to inside the house. Over this past year, the mess has turned into garbage that is throughout the house and has been mounting outside. They now have a massive garbage mountain in their driveway that is attracting all sorts of nasty animals to the neighborhood. The last straw for me is that their disgusting fleas have infiltrated my house.

There are 9 people, 2 dogs, and 1 cat living at the house. Of the 9 people, there are 4 children ranging in age from 8-16.

I don't want the kids to get taken away, but I am sick of their filthy hoarder mess. I know that if I call, they'll know it was me, as their mess is hidden from the street and they don't allow other visitors.

What should I do?




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Aleksandar 


Location: United States
Gender: Male
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your darkest shadow, my oldest friend; the world's become ashes, this is the end.

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Re: Is it ok to call CPS/DHS on your relatives?
< Reply # 1 on 9/15/2011 3:39 PM >
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step back and ask yourself a few questions first.

1. Do you have enough information to make the judgment as to what is best for these kids?

Being taken from their home can be an enormously traumatic and scarring event in the life of a child -- far more so than divorce. Unless these kids are suffering serious physical and emotional abuse, it is likely that the intervention of the State and removal of the children would cause more harm than good. (too, the state wouldnt remove the children unless the conditions inside the house posed an immediate risk to their health, safety and wellbeing).

2. Is this about the kids? Is this about the cleanliness of the neighborhood? Is it about the fleas in your home?

If the kids are removed, in all likelihood the garbage problem will not go away -- and will possibly get worse.

3. Are there other less drastic steps you can take? For example, filing a complaint with the city department of sanitation.


All in all, calling CPS is a very drastic step, and unless the health, safety and wellbeing of the kids is at risk it is unlikely this would be a beneficial step to take.




Freedom breeds war; and Peace, slavery. So it shall be forevermore: Men who love freedom buy it with their lives, and lovers of peace with their freedom.
Esoterik 


Location: Kansas City
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Re: Is it ok to call CPS/DHS on your relatives?
< Reply # 2 on 9/15/2011 9:21 PM >
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Teachers are mandated reporters. Teachers should make the call if they notice signs of abuse and neglect. Maybe you could discreetly contact the schools and ask them to keep an eye on the kids as you have reason to suspect neglect at home. Stress you want to remain anonymous.




“You've got to remember that these are just simple farmers. These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know... morons.”
Opheliaism 

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Location: Out on the border of everything and nothing, TN
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Ophie

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Re: Is it ok to call CPS/DHS on your relatives?
< Reply # 3 on 9/15/2011 9:39 PM >
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Most child welfare services would rather help the children stay in the family environment than take them out and would probably utilize several departments to help both the parents and the children. I would say it is better to call attention it to now before it becomes more of an issue than just garbage and fleas. If it got bad enough, the city could just step in and condemn the place and then they would be homeless. And most calls to DHS and similar are anonymous. Good luck with that.




Show up at 9:30 with 15 dollars cash and your fingers crossed.

<Mandias> I think she's gonna slug that cop. -------------------------------------------------------- <Axle> "She's just not a farmer Owen, she has too much of her Father in her." <Axle> Death by Hut
Neptune 


Location: Maine
Gender: Female
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The Albino Explorer

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Re: Is it ok to call CPS/DHS on your relatives?
< Reply # 4 on 9/16/2011 4:06 AM >
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Being taken from the home rarely happens in Maine, but I think the call is necessary to perhaps scare their family into action. I know that if it did come down to the children being taken from the home, then there would have to be more than just cause. Living with a hoarder is very mentally damming. The kids never have friends over and are rarely if ever invited to their friends homes because they come to school smelly and flea bitten.

Very sadly and unfortunately, the teacher of the youngest child did notice something was going on. My young cousin went to school smelly and dirty almost every day without a snack or lunch money. On the rare occasion that my aunt remembered to send her with food, her lunch box was filthy and full of mold. She was also absent from school way more than she should have been. My mother worked at the school she was attending at the time and the teachers would ask her about my cousin's home life, and my mother would tell them everything was ok and try to cover up by buying her lunch, combing her hair, and giving her warm clothes during winter. (My aunt never sent her to school in appropriate clothes)

This is tough. I know the kids are at very least loved, clothed, and fed, but they are living in filth. It's gotten to the point where the filth is spreading and cannot be ignored anymore. I may not call CPS, but I have to do SOMETHING.




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http://www.flickr....s/smsailorneptune/ http://smsailorneptune.deviantart.com/
Opheliaism 

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Location: Out on the border of everything and nothing, TN
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Ophie

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Re: Is it ok to call CPS/DHS on your relatives?
< Reply # 5 on 9/16/2011 4:10 AM >
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I feel for you and the situation. But yeah, you have to think of those kids and the life they deserve. And maybe get some help for their mother.




Show up at 9:30 with 15 dollars cash and your fingers crossed.

<Mandias> I think she's gonna slug that cop. -------------------------------------------------------- <Axle> "She's just not a farmer Owen, she has too much of her Father in her." <Axle> Death by Hut
mewthree 


Location: Montreal, Quebec, Canada
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Re: Is it ok to call CPS/DHS on your relatives?
< Reply # 6 on 9/17/2011 7:58 PM >
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I say you light the trash pile on fire... that will get somebody there.. get rid of some trash.. force them to clean up..

just dont get caught.


anyways, dont even worry about them finding out you called anybody... they got a trash mountain ffs, who cares about what they think is right and wrong.




UER Forum > Private Boards Index > Relationships > Is it ok to call CPS/DHS on your relatives? (Viewed 2330 times)


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