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UER Forum > Private Boards Index > Religious Discussion > Scientology? (Viewed 10961 times)
DevilC 


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Scientology?
< on 9/6/2006 12:19 PM >
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Cruise, his robot wife, and clone have brought the pseudo-religion of scientology into the public light.
So, what do you make of scientology?
I am terribly entertained by a cult that believes 75 million years ago Xenu, the alien ruler of the "Galactic Confederacy," brought billions of people to Earth in spacecraft oddly akin to DC-8 jets, stacked them around volcanoes and blew them up with hydrogen bombs and that all of our problems are caused by the hauntings of these poor lost souls.





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Squidgit 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 1 on 9/6/2006 12:29 PM >
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I think it's a bunch of crap that 'only cool people' can be apart of..

...........give me a break.. LOSERS




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KublaKhan 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 2 on 9/6/2006 4:22 PM >
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I wonder how Tom scored on his 'Personality Test?'

I scored something like minus 1200. I fucked up their Personality Testing machine Big Time.




"The truth is knowable. But probably not, ever, incontrovertible."
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DevilC 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 3 on 9/6/2006 5:11 PM >
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Posted by KublaKhan
I wonder how Tom scored on his 'Personality Test?'
I scored something like minus 1200. I fucked up their Personality Testing machine Big Time.

Kubla, you were audited?
Praise hell.
Tell us about the experience!




Science flies you to the Moon. Religion flies you into tall buildings.
KublaKhan 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 4 on 9/6/2006 11:43 PM >
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Well...I standing outside this building minding my own business, chewing gum, etc. and this nice lady with bright withe teeth came up to me and asked me how I felt, (I asked her to feel me for herself...she didn't respond) and I said something like, "Pretty fucking good," and she offered to take me inside where I would be tested and I submitted and I don't remember much after that, other than there was this bright light that shone in my face and then there were these funny grey faces staring at me, and one of them pointed out a window and there, against the blackness as black as black can be, was a little blue dot, and this grey faced person pointed to the dot and I guess it was kinda strange and then I blacked out and then I woke up and there was another funny grey face (that looked suspiciously like Tom Cruise) and I felt something hard go into my bum and I felt all warm and lucious and then this Tom Cruise funny grey face started shaking its hips and then it spat out this green ooze from some weird appendage located iin its midsection and then the funny grey Tom cruise face lit a smoke and before you knew it, i was back standing on the street, minding my own business and chewing gum.

I later found a slip of paper in my pants pocket. At first, i thought it was the funny Tom Cruise grey face's phone number...cuz you know, I usually say NO on the first date...but it turned out to be my test score.

According to The Church of scientology, I have no personality. And I'm an easy lay. Now I understand why the funny faced grey Tom Cruise kept calling me Paris.





"The truth is knowable. But probably not, ever, incontrovertible."
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monster 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 5 on 3/18/2007 2:55 PM >
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yea, scientologists are crazy. they think phycology and drugs such as prozac, and zoloft are evil. Tom Cruise insulted a depressed woman for taking prozac. I was watching 48 hours mystery and this guy had scizofrenia and his family knew it but they refused to treat it becuase they were scientologists and he ended up killing his parents.




White Rabbit 

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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 6 on 3/18/2007 3:55 PM >
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I think they're a bunch of gullible jackasses. Anybody that thinks you can get completely healthy by taking vitamins and going to the sauna needs to ask themselves why all the fucking doctors in the world aren't prescribing those miracle treatments.

And all the space alien shit.




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KublaKhan 


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With Satan, it's always gimmie, gimmie.

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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 7 on 3/18/2007 5:16 PM >
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Posted by White Rabbit
I think they're a bunch of gullible jackasses. Anybody that thinks you can get completely healthy by taking vitamins and going to the sauna needs to ask themselves why all the fucking doctors in the world aren't prescribing those miracle treatments.

And all the space alien shit.


But it's all true. Look how healthy and happy Tom Cruise is. And John Travolta, and Beck, and that ex-Cheers fattie chick what's-her-name.




"The truth is knowable. But probably not, ever, incontrovertible."
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TrixieSparrow 


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I guess.

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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 8 on 3/18/2007 5:41 PM >
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BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

Once TaP and I wanted to go into a scientology church thing but Jono wouldn't let us. It's like he tought we would cause them trouble! TaP and I NEVER cause trouble!




KublaKhan 


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With Satan, it's always gimmie, gimmie.

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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 9 on 3/18/2007 6:59 PM >
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Posted by Trixie_Sparrow
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

Once TaP and I wanted to go into a scientology church thing but Jono wouldn't let us. It's like he tought we would cause them trouble! TaP and I NEVER cause trouble!


BULLSHIT ALERT




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--Don DeLillo
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TrixieSparrow 


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I guess.

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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 10 on 3/18/2007 7:30 PM >
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Posted by KublaKhan


BULLSHIT ALERT


whatevs. I'm an angel and TaP is a sweet innocent child.




underdark 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 11 on 3/19/2007 5:20 PM >
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Someone might want to check my geology, but I seem to recall hawaii isn't 75,000,000 years old.

And even if it is, L Ron was still the ultimate scam artist. He actually said he was going to make up a religion to avoid paying taxes, then did it. And got people to buy it! Fuckin brilliant!

The people at the top are getting FAT off the losers that buy this crap, so I guess it is just like a real religion that way.




tekriter 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 12 on 3/19/2007 5:22 PM >
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In Canada, the Church of Scientology is considered a religious non-profit organization; its application for charity status was rejected in 1999. In 1992, Scientology became the only religious organization convicted in criminal court on two counts of breach of the public trust (for an organized conspiracy to infiltrate government offices) following a trial by jury.

I read an article, where, I can no longer recall, that asserted that L. Ron Hubbard invented scientology on a bar bet that he couldn't invent a religion to make money.

In the UK scientology is considered a company to make money.

Seems like a reasonable explanation for all that BS.

By the way, it's Mormons that think that aliens drop off golden tablets. That's why the Simpsons's aliens are so funny.




It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creed into law if it acquires the political power to do so, and will follow it by suppressing opposition, subverting all education to seize early the minds of the young, and by killing, locking up, or driving underground all heretics. Robert A. Heinlen
MutantMandias 

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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 13 on 3/19/2007 6:05 PM >
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Posted by KublaKhan
I wonder how Tom scored on his 'Personality Test?'

I scored something like minus 1200. I fucked up their Personality Testing machine Big Time.


A couple of my friends and I went in and took these once. I had known they were crazy before we went, but let me just note here, THOSE FUCKERS ARE CRAZY.

They separated the three of us as quickly as they could so that we would be most vulnerable. Little did they know that the three of us had gone through cults before, so we weren't terribly worried.

I don't remember what I "got" on their personality test, but the test is so full of shit anyway. I know about making personality tests, and this one wasn't designed to evaluate anything. It was designed to make you doubt your own decisions in life. Then they come out and tell you, "You are amazingly smart. Wow. We are really impressed. But it seems like there are things that you are not entirely happy with." Blah blah blah. It was like one of those timeshare hard sells where they keep you in a room for hours until you either threaten to kill someone or sign up.

I was pretty pleased with the outcome though. The guy who trying to manipulate me finally had to go and get some higher level supervisor to come to the room to try to break me. And in the end, I even made that guy so spitting mad and frustrated that he ended up yelling for me to get the hell out of the place.

All in all, a very good day.




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DevilC 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 14 on 3/19/2007 6:21 PM >
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Posted by MutantMandias
I was pretty pleased with the outcome though. The guy who trying to manipulate me finally had to go and get some higher level supervisor to come to the room to try to break me. And in the end, I even made that guy so spitting mad and frustrated that he ended up yelling for me to get the hell out of the place.

God (or insert other non-offensive diety here!) Bless you Mandias!
I had a similar experience with a few of my Intel buddies and a Scientology center/temple/place.
It is so pleasing to get them so exasperated they lose their tempers.
Did you turn the tables and engage them with the same questions they were posing to you?
Their level of training is fairly minimal I found and it's very easy to drag them outside their comfort zone.
Go us.





Science flies you to the Moon. Religion flies you into tall buildings.
MutantMandias 

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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 15 on 3/19/2007 6:46 PM >
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Yeah, I really can't remember the specifics too well. It was about 15 years ago, but I can tell you that these guys certainly weren't the highest quality brainwashers.

The thing which really sent them over the top was my asking about the E-Meter they had on display. I picked up on a little defensiveness in them, because they knew there was no way they could explain it, and I kind of milked the fact that they must have their own doubts about these things if they are unable to understand the "SCIENCE" involved.




mutantMandias may cause dizziness, sexual nightmares, and sleep crime. ++++ mutantMandias has to return some videotapes ++++ Do not taunt mutantMandias

mutantMandias is something more than human, more than a computer. mutantMandias is a murderously intelligent, sensually self-programmed, non-being
monster 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 16 on 3/20/2007 2:21 AM >
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are there any scientology churches in Houston? I want to fuck with them




DevilC 


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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 17 on 3/20/2007 12:55 PM >
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Posted by monster
are there any scientology churches in Houston? I want to fuck with them

You want to fuck with them and you cannot even do a search for it?
I suspect you will soon be a Scientologist!




Science flies you to the Moon. Religion flies you into tall buildings.
MutantMandias 

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Are you a reporter? Contact me for a UE interview! Also not averse to the the idea of group/anal.

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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 18 on 3/20/2007 2:29 PM >
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Posted by DevilC

You want to fuck with them and you cannot even do a search for it?
I suspect you will soon be a Scientologist!



Ahhhahaha. It's rare that you make me laugh, DevilC. Well done, sir.




mutantMandias may cause dizziness, sexual nightmares, and sleep crime. ++++ mutantMandias has to return some videotapes ++++ Do not taunt mutantMandias

mutantMandias is something more than human, more than a computer. mutantMandias is a murderously intelligent, sensually self-programmed, non-being
TrixieSparrow 


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I guess.

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Re: Scientology?
< Reply # 19 on 3/20/2007 3:21 PM >
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shhh! stop talking ill of them! aliens are gunna tap into this and come eat our brains!

lucky for Mandias he doesnt have one.




UER Forum > Private Boards Index > Religious Discussion > Scientology? (Viewed 10961 times)
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