Ok, check this out. Disclaimer, seriously, I am not "my friend" in this story.

My friend has been dating a monster for the last 12 months. For the both of them, it was their first serious relationship. They went to high school together, but re-met on Myspace. Here's the kicker. My friend smokes, drinks, and rocks out. This girl is the most boring person on Earth. She studies dance in college, even though she lacks the looks to be able to even get cast in her school's performances, let alone anything serious after she graduates. They have nothing in common but sheer mutual desperation. They would fight all the time. Things would get broken. But the icing on the cake was that these fights wouldn't happen in person, or even on the phone, they would happen on AOL Instant Messenger, and they would never end. My friend went from being my friend to being a shell of a man that was trained like Pavlov's dogs to tap the keys on his keyboard for the 'reward' of getting to be her 'boyfriend'.

They had a fight (online) recently that culminated with her, 200+ miles away, calling the police on him for a "welfare check". He didn't like that, and finally sees that it's time for a change. Now here's the problem.

My friend isn't an ugly guy, but he's got some esteem issues and he sure as hell ain't rich (read: he's pretty strapped for cash most of the time). I need to find a way to get my poor, lazy, albeit decent looking and funny friend to get out and meet girls. So far I've taken him to the mall in our area a couple of times, at least just to get out and be a social being (not on AIM).

I'm looking for specific suggestions of out to get to meet girls while he's still on the rebound. Obvious aside: the mall, seedy bars, etc. I want him to meet someone completely new, so girls already in my or his social network are out. Any ideas?

No offense, dude, but your friend sounds like a whipped little pussy bitch.

And I'd wager that his Pussy Bitch Aura is flashing like a red alert to any decent females he runs across and killing his chances.

He needs to fix that before he even thinks about getting involved with someone. Once he does, the pussy juice will flow like an artesian well.

Guys who don't need a woman attract them like flies.

sounds like the same exact problem my nephew is having... but in his case hes a total moron and at this point he deserves whatever shes gonna do to him for being so dumb

My humble answer: Remove him from the internet, then find him something else to do(all puns intended).

I don't know about the other women here, but I personally don't like being referred to as a "female".

Possible suggestions:
1. Lady
2. Girl
3. Woman
4. Ladytype
5. Chick

I would rather be called any of those, but not "female".

Posted by SaraBellum I don't know about the other women here, but I personally don't like being referred to as a "female". Possible suggestions: 1. Lady 2. Girl 3. Woman 4. Ladytype 5. Chick I would rather be called any of those, but not "female".

I've always been partial to "you fuckin' broads."

Posted by White Rabbit I've always been partial to "you fuckin' broads."

Pfft. Weak. "Doe-eyed nightmares" is where it's at.

have him read "the game" by Neil Strauss. This will give you an idea of how clueless he is. then, shit, i dunno, go to the park.

get him high on PCP and have him pick fights at a bar, that should impress someone

Posted by nohbdyshome get him high on PCP and have him pick fights at a bar, that should impress someone

Love.this.answer.

With that being said; the more you try to force the guy to do what YOU want him to do, the more he will resist. Especially because of his self esteem issues.

This might be one he needs to learn for himself.

Posted by Debi Love.this.answer. With that being said; the more you try to force the guy to do what YOU want him to do, the more he will resist. Especially because of his self esteem issues. This might be one he needs to learn for himself.

Appreciate the emphasis on ME (read YOU) but it's not just me, that's the thing. Literally everyone in his life, and hers, think their relationship is (was) the worst thing ever. It took being woken up by the police to get it into his head that something was wrong.

Sara, female is the technical term for a person with two X chromosomes, not sure what you were thinking I meant by that.

Posted by INeedAttention.com Sara, female is the technical term for a person with two X chromosomes, not sure what you were thinking I meant by that.

I know what the word "female" means. It's just a habit of guys that I despise. I thought at first it was a military thing, but I hear it from all kinds of menfolk.

Interesting; I apologize. Never heard anyone take offense to that.

Posted by INeedAttention.com Appreciate the emphasis on ME (read YOU) but it's not just me, that's the thing. Literally everyone in his life, and hers, think their relationship is (was) the worst thing ever. It took being woken up by the police to get it into his head that something was wrong. Sara, female is the technical term for a person with two X chromosomes, not sure what you were thinking I meant by that.

Yeah, I didn't mean YOU in that sense. I meant more in a "anybody else but him" kind of way. My bad.

I just hate the phrase y'all!

Most times people have to get to their own breaking point. And it doesn't matter what other people are telling them, even if its all true and for their own good.

On the other hand, some people enjoy being in unhealthy, combative relationships. People with self esteem issues sometimes take that negative attention (like jealousy and being irrational) and think its a form of love.

Posted by SaraBellum I don't know about the other women here, but I personally don't like being referred to as a "female". Possible suggestions: 1. Lady 2. Girl 3. Woman 4. Ladytype 5. Chick I would rather be called any of those, but not "female".

what about "The Female(of the species)"

what about "Member of the weaker sex"

Posted by KONG what about "Member of the weaker sex"

haha.. that's bullshit..

How about... a punch in your face?

Posted by vicexsquad haha.. that's bullshit.. How about... a punch in your face?

thats hot

Posted by vicexsquad haha.. that's bullshit.. How about... a punch in your face?

Awww, that's so cute. I bet you're like a little wild kitten hissing at somebody when you're mad.

Posted by KONG what about "Member of the weaker sex"

I like "member of the sex that is able to have mutliple orgasms in short periods of time" SOOOO much better ;)