get engaged?
i found out that 2 people that i know from a bar i drink at got engaged today- i will bet $20 they dont make it 6 months... but i do wish them the best of luck.
cdevon1200

Posted by cdevon1200 get engaged? i found out that 2 people that i know from a bar i drink at got engaged today- i will bet $20 they dont make it 6 months... but i do wish them the best of luck. cdevon1200

A former friend of mine, not the one mentioned in the recent thread that I posted, was engaged to a guy, but they broke it off mutually after she realized just how difficult maintaining a long distance relationship is.

Curious_George and I.
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KIDDING!!!
;P

Reminds me of a friend of mine..He's a cool guy..but doesn't have great luck in the relationship department. He always tries to pick up the "socially attracting" girls..the girls that seem almost too perfect. He met (her) and no sooner she controlled everything..He stopped hanging out with friends..everything..And as quick as she changed everything in his life..she left him..and he had nothing left.

She is on the path to renewing herself from a 'bad' past. I do not believe that she realizes how independent she's about to be. he knows this and wants to scoop her up, probably the 20 year age difference.

I think once, (IF) she gets her life together she will end up cheating on him thinking she can do better... END.

My friend and her boyfriend were actually told by their counselor that their relationship was probably NOT going to work out.

Its bad enough to actually start seeing a marriage counselor BEFORE you get married; but to the counselor tell you that you should throw in the towel?? DAMN!

Posted by Debi Its bad enough to actually start seeing a marriage counselor BEFORE you get married.

A former Pastor of mine actually insisted the couples have counseling (he even offered to provide it) before he married them. It was more to help them get ready then to solve a problem or issue.

Posted by Axle A former Pastor of mine actually insisted the couples have counseling (he even offered to provide it) before he married them. It was more to help them get ready then to solve a problem or issue.

Yeah, we still have that at my church also, although a lot of churches have done away with it. Kinda like a pre-requisite for getting married in that particular church.

These two are going to your typical "our marriage sucks" type of counseling. I guess the fact that the counselor threw in the towel was what blew me away.

Posted by Axle A former Pastor of mine actually insisted the couples have counseling (he even offered to provide it) before he married them. It was more to help them get ready then to solve a problem or issue.

That happens here, too, even with civil ceremonies - I think there's some kind of government initiative to provide couples with at least rudimentary relationship maintenance skills. Has to be a good thing, right?

I believe that no one should get married unless they have LIVED WITH the person for AT LEAST 4-5 years. Gives you enough time to learn if you really want to spend the rest of your life with someone.

But then again, I'm normally extremely pessimistic about marriages. I've never seen a successful one.

Posted by Oryx I believe that no one should get married unless they have LIVED WITH the person for AT LEAST 4-5 years. Gives you enough time to learn if you really want to spend the rest of your life with someone. But then again, I'm normally extremely pessimistic about marriages. I've never seen a successful one.

My ex wife and I lived together for 7 years before we got married... still ended in divorce. On the flip side, A couple I know just celebrated their 35th anniversary(They got married on the day they met).

Just goes to show, there is NEVER any way you can tell how it will pan out.

Posted by Oryx I believe that no one should get married unless they have LIVED WITH the person for AT LEAST 4-5 years. Gives you enough time to learn if you really want to spend the rest of your life with someone. But then again, I'm normally extremely pessimistic about marriages. I've never seen a successful one.

My parents. Been together since they were 16, lived together since they were 18. 50 next year, as I like to remind them.

Then there's people like the guy I work with.

He's afraid of getting a divorce because his wife makes five times the money he does and she'll take half of his if he does leave. So, they both fool around on the side.

They've been married over 30 years.

Shael

In the words of Boris Yomikov...


"Whatever works"

Posted by Shael Then there's people like the guy I work with. He's afraid of getting a divorce because his wife makes five times the money he does and she'll take half of his if he does leave. So, they both fool around on the side. They've been married over 30 years. Shael

Um, if his wife makes five times as much as him, then won't he stand to benefit from a divorce, e.g. can't he claim alimony?

Posted by Shawn W. Um, if his wife makes five times as much as him, then won't he stand to benefit from a divorce, e.g. can't he claim alimony?

It's almost always the men that get fucked over in that situation. Because of my boyfriends job, he sees this sorta thing every day.

Posted by Oryx It's almost always the men that get fucked over in that situation. Because of my boyfriends job, he sees this sorta thing every day.

I understand that, but from the info that we've been given, it sounds like the husband hasn't even looked into it. Regardless of how on the rocks a relationship is, I won't condone infidelity. If it's that bad, then unless the consequence is death, break it off.

Move to a "no fault" state then use the cheating on both sides as reason to annul the marriage.

Or perhaps they both enjoy it, they get to fuck whoever they want and have a degree of mutual support...

He's looked into it. Repeatedly.

In NY, most likely they'd let her claim spousal support, and get half of everything, as well as keep the cars and house. As this state is also a community property state. It's one reason you should keep at least one bank account separate.

She's smart, she keeps everything she makes separate. Also there's no prenup as she started making crazy money selling houses only a few years ago.

My coworker is just cheap, that's what it comes down to, I think anyway. She'd get half of his pay, retirement, etc.

The killer is she has proof of him cheating, but he has no proof on her, even though he's seen the men she's been with, so she'd actually win in this circumstance.

Shael

In divorce, nobody wins.

Nobody.

Not ever.

Period.