Posted by victoria-
its just pot, not a huge deal. and i dont mind i just dislike the habitual way he does it. like if hes stressed hes lighting up when i know thers so many other ways to deal with it. but hes realising that and trying for me.
|
I'm about to be a complete bitch, as a friend. Please don't cry, I mean this from the bottom of my heart to be honest and not sugar coat anything.
The problem I'm seeing is that you're way to wrapped up in you and what you want but you're not strong enough to actually do anything. You're being kind of pathetic. Oh I want a boyfriend, it's okay if he does things I don't like because he makes me feel special one day a month. IMO, if you wanted to help him, you wouldn't have clung so hard. If he needed distance, that was kind of a sign that you weren't helping him and he wanted to try something new. Or that being alone would be better for him. But you got what YOU wanted - that's not a relationship. That's being a whiny, clingy female. You could have helped him as a friend.
When you started this thread, I assumed you were the girl on the side and he wanted distance to be with somebody else. Maybe somebody who does drugs. I'm not saying this IS the way it is, I'm saying maybe this is what's wrong. And don't ever assume he doesn't just because he hides it well- I used to have somebody on the side all the time and it's really quite easy to hide.
Fuck however bad this guy is for you - You're terrible for him. If you're willing to stay with somebody just to be with them - well you're in the relationship for all the wrong reasons. Just to have a boyfriend? That's a slap in the face to him. Because he buys you things? That's another slap in the face. That's basically you saying "I'm only with you because you make me happy 1/10th of the time, oh and sometimes you buy me shit, and I guess your problems aren't that hard to put up with if you're buying me shit"
You can really honestly help him as just a friend, you don't have to be sleeping with him or dating to be there for him. You should take that break, and just stay close. Believe it or not, boys and girls can be just friends. Then once he's better, you can always get back together.
I was pathetic and clingy once, clutching onto whatever I had because I NEEDED to feel whole inside, to have somebody think I'm special, to be close to people at all times. I'm not saying you're exactly like I was, but the only way I learned was by somebody telling me it was time to grow up and get strong.
Good luck. You seem to have a wonderful character and I hope you don't end up on the bottom of all this. If you ever need somebody to talk to feel free to drop me a line.
order your copy of Access All Areas today!
